I can't decide if I should call myself a Twilight fan. I like making fun of it A LOT. Can that be considered a fan? I'm definitely not a fan of the books, I read the first one and that was enough of that forever. But of the pop-culture phenomenon, I think I'd have to consider myself a fan. Like this video...
...how is that not awesome?
Speaking of the Twilight phenomenon, I have a semi-related rant after reading opinions of several Twilight-haters. (Here is one example, but most of the teeth gnashing I come across is done in message boards and blog post comments. Here's a small offensive sampling.) I get a little annoyed at the excessive hand wringing done over the "bad message for teenage girls" thing. It isn't the best message for girls, I agree. But I don't see nearly the same level of pearl-clutching done for the billions of things out there that are a bad message for teenage boys. Rap music, violent video games, unrealistic expectations of female beauty, Megan Fox... there are plenty of negative media influences out there polluting our teenage boys. Sure, there is some hand-wringing and pearl-clutching, but not like there is for Twilight. No one thinks the Transformers movie spells doom for our civilization.
This bothers me because the disproportionate response over Twilight suggests that teenage girls are less able to handle negative influences than boys. That their delicate girly minds aren't strong enough to be exposed to Twilight and reasonably deduce that a book about vampires is different than real life. Maybe the negative reaction to Twilight is the appropriate response and we're selling our teenage boys short, but either way, it annoys me. Let girls have their escapist fantasy. If they can't come out of it unscathed, then they had problems before reading Twilight. Let's not blame the crappy books. Mercilessly mock them instead. It's way more fun.
Showing posts with label well i never. Show all posts
Showing posts with label well i never. Show all posts
November 24, 2009
October 12, 2009
Because, for some reason, it isn't obvious
New Rule for the universe!
When in a public restroom, you are NOT allowed to talk to your stall neighbors.
Apparently, this isn't some instinctively understood code of behavior. I have had this happen to me THRICE in my lifetime, the third time being today. And I'm only 27. That means, if I live a slightly longer than normal life time, this could happen to me nine times. That is nine times too many. So I'm taking a stand. Talking to the person in the bathroom stall next to you is NOT ALLOWED. And yes, [name removed], this rule applies to sisters.
When in a public restroom, you are NOT allowed to talk to your stall neighbors.
Apparently, this isn't some instinctively understood code of behavior. I have had this happen to me THRICE in my lifetime, the third time being today. And I'm only 27. That means, if I live a slightly longer than normal life time, this could happen to me nine times. That is nine times too many. So I'm taking a stand. Talking to the person in the bathroom stall next to you is NOT ALLOWED. And yes, [name removed], this rule applies to sisters.
August 27, 2009
Good-bye Mr. W!
Someone stole the license plate off of my car last night. When I saw it was missing, I started looking for it on the ground, because I'm sure license plates often just fall off of parked cars.
My sister Carly, self-proclaimed expert on license plate theft (among other things), informed me that it was stolen for my yellow "10" registration sticker. I kind of hope that's true, because that sticker is CRAZY GLUED to the license plate. Seriously. Getting my car registered this year was the most obnoxious series of FAIL ever. So of course, when I finally got the sticker, it wouldn't stick to the plate. Those things are usually like super magnets, once it even senses it's near the license plate, it's stuck forever. But this year, the sticker wasn't sticky. By that point, I was so frustrated, I drove to the hardware store, bought a tube of crazy glue, and poured about half of it on the back of that stupid sticker. Good luck getting THAT peeled off, license plate-stealing hooligans!
It's only $13 to replace, so it's not much more than an inconvenience. But if you see someone driving around with a 250 MRW plate, do... something. Honk at them maybe? Or glare as you pass by. That'll show 'em, I'm sure.
My sister Carly, self-proclaimed expert on license plate theft (among other things), informed me that it was stolen for my yellow "10" registration sticker. I kind of hope that's true, because that sticker is CRAZY GLUED to the license plate. Seriously. Getting my car registered this year was the most obnoxious series of FAIL ever. So of course, when I finally got the sticker, it wouldn't stick to the plate. Those things are usually like super magnets, once it even senses it's near the license plate, it's stuck forever. But this year, the sticker wasn't sticky. By that point, I was so frustrated, I drove to the hardware store, bought a tube of crazy glue, and poured about half of it on the back of that stupid sticker. Good luck getting THAT peeled off, license plate-stealing hooligans!
It's only $13 to replace, so it's not much more than an inconvenience. But if you see someone driving around with a 250 MRW plate, do... something. Honk at them maybe? Or glare as you pass by. That'll show 'em, I'm sure.
August 10, 2009
Whoa indeed!
Online chat with my dad, about me possibly buying a new car:
Jamie: i'd get the full incentive with the versa (if i get the manual transmission) and it starts at about 11,000.
Dad: You, driving with a clutch -- whoa!
Jamie: my car now is a clutch
Dad: oh
Jamie: you don't remember me crying while you taught me how to drive it?
Dad: that's right
Jamie: i guess it isn't burned into your memory
Dad: It's not that, it's more a matter of the memory burning away.
My dad teaching me how to drive stick? TRAUMATIC. There were tears. And yelling. And stopping at the intersection to switch seats while we drove the rest of the way home in awkward silence. (It's easy to mix up 3rd and 1st gear when it's new, okay?!) I shouldn't have reminded him, and made him teach it to me again. Amaze him with my seemingly innate ability to drive a manual transmission. Maybe heal some of that awkward trauma and gain some "best daughter ever" points (as if I need anymore).
Jamie: i'd get the full incentive with the versa (if i get the manual transmission) and it starts at about 11,000.
Dad: You, driving with a clutch -- whoa!
Jamie: my car now is a clutch
Dad: oh
Jamie: you don't remember me crying while you taught me how to drive it?
Dad: that's right
Jamie: i guess it isn't burned into your memory
Dad: It's not that, it's more a matter of the memory burning away.
My dad teaching me how to drive stick? TRAUMATIC. There were tears. And yelling. And stopping at the intersection to switch seats while we drove the rest of the way home in awkward silence. (It's easy to mix up 3rd and 1st gear when it's new, okay?!) I shouldn't have reminded him, and made him teach it to me again. Amaze him with my seemingly innate ability to drive a manual transmission. Maybe heal some of that awkward trauma and gain some "best daughter ever" points (as if I need anymore).
July 30, 2009
Isn't chewing gum exciting enough?
Chewing this gum does not make me feel like I'm diving into an iceberg as it melts. It's supposed to change from cold to hot in my mouth as I chew. It doesn't seem to be working, but it does taste a lot like IcyHot.
April 15, 2009
Where's a Trapper-Keeper when I need one?
When I found out that Taylor Kitsch is playing Gambit in the new X-Men movie, I fan-girled for the first time ever.
Scene: Me and Jill watching TV.
Jill: Ooh X-Men preview! I wonder if Tim Riggins is Gambit.
Me: TIM RIGGINS?!?! WHAT?!
Jill: He's in the new X-Men movie.
Me: HE'S IN THE NEW X-MEN MOVIE?!?!?!
Jill: *surprised I don't already know this* Yeah... just watch.
Taylor Kitsch: *appears on screen during X-Men commercial*
Me: EEEEEEEE!!!!!! *hands flailing*
Jill: I have you never seen you fangirl before. It's quite amusing.
Now I "geek out" over many things: Survivor, Lord of the Rings, Arrested Development, Harry Potter, and more recently Star Trek. "Geeking out" involves knowing way too many facts about, being able to quote entire scenes from, dressing up as, posting on message boards about, dropping random quotes from...and many other things that indicate very high interest in a book, tv show, movie, or person. It may be exceedingly nerdy, but it's all very calm and orderly. But fangirling is much, much different. In addition to everything listed above, it involves squeeling, ALLCAPS, poor grammar and exclamation points. It is loud, insane, highly mockable, and in some instances can be scary. (See: TwiMoms.) For laid-back people like myself, "geeking out" is much preferred. Fangirls are to be pointed at while laughing.
BUT OMG TIM RIGGINS IS GAMBIT!!!!!
(And if you do not know who Tim Riggins is, I feel great pity for you.)
Scene: Me and Jill watching TV.
Jill: Ooh X-Men preview! I wonder if Tim Riggins is Gambit.
Me: TIM RIGGINS?!?! WHAT?!
Jill: He's in the new X-Men movie.
Me: HE'S IN THE NEW X-MEN MOVIE?!?!?!
Jill: *surprised I don't already know this* Yeah... just watch.
Taylor Kitsch: *appears on screen during X-Men commercial*
Me: EEEEEEEE!!!!!! *hands flailing*
Jill: I have you never seen you fangirl before. It's quite amusing.
Now I "geek out" over many things: Survivor, Lord of the Rings, Arrested Development, Harry Potter, and more recently Star Trek. "Geeking out" involves knowing way too many facts about, being able to quote entire scenes from, dressing up as, posting on message boards about, dropping random quotes from...and many other things that indicate very high interest in a book, tv show, movie, or person. It may be exceedingly nerdy, but it's all very calm and orderly. But fangirling is much, much different. In addition to everything listed above, it involves squeeling, ALLCAPS, poor grammar and exclamation points. It is loud, insane, highly mockable, and in some instances can be scary. (See: TwiMoms.) For laid-back people like myself, "geeking out" is much preferred. Fangirls are to be pointed at while laughing.
BUT OMG TIM RIGGINS IS GAMBIT!!!!!
(And if you do not know who Tim Riggins is, I feel great pity for you.)
March 26, 2009
Classy
To express contempt with style, etiquette, and propriety:
To express satisfaction with style, etiquette, and propriety:
Top hat! Monocle!
- Well I never!
- Goodness gracious me!
- Indeed!
- How crude!
- Hello! What's this?! / What's all this then?
- I say!
To express satisfaction with style, etiquette, and propriety:
- Jolly good!
- Capital!
- Good show lads!
- Indeed! (It has a double meaning. The key is tone.)
- Quite! Quite!
- Smashing!
Top hat! Monocle!February 6, 2009
One small bite is enough to fill the stomach of a grown man!
Pop quiz! Can you tell the difference between these:
If yes, congratulations. You are smarter than the employee with the morning shift at my local McDonald's. At least the idiot person who ordered a disgusting food bag ON PURPOSE is in for a pleasant surprise.
Exhibit A: Disgusting food bag
And
Exhibit B: Delicious sandwich from heaven
Exhibit B: Delicious sandwich from heaven
If yes, congratulations. You are smarter than the employee with the morning shift at my local McDonald's. At least the idiot person who ordered a disgusting food bag ON PURPOSE is in for a pleasant surprise.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)