November 15, 2013

This is why we have blogs.

Blogs are for things no one else cares about but that you can't convince yourself aren't universally fascinating and sure to show up in a museum some day next to the display case of Jane Austen' spoons. Things like dreams I had, my results from the "which woodland animal is your inner spirit guide" test (badger, didn't even need to take the test, I just know), and the facebook statuses I would post if I were a robot*.

*There's a slight chance I am a robot, so I guess those would just be my regular facebook statuses. I already use facebook to mock myself there. This is why I'm posting these on my blog. I mean, I can never get enough of making fun of myself, but I do recognize that other people may get sick of it.

I have to go to prove anything that’s even remotely true!

JamieBot is on a mission.

I have this whole lovely rant typed out about pigs and stipped stopped signing them inappropriately and a fleshcolored knife.

JamieBot can't spell. Let's all point and laugh. (Then run away. It has a knife.)

Now I'm picturing an elaborately choreographed performance by my dad, but I'm cautiously optimistic.

My dad's greatest dream is to choreograph an elaborate family dance routine involving wheeled office chairs and fire extinguishers. (I'm not kidding.) Unlike me, JamieBot is on board. 

Tiffany you know why is the sun red?

Put on pants?

This movie keeps making me to tell it's been interrupted by a pony tail holder. Guess where it a mushroom, you sign up, tell me your address in a cool and MASH.

Whatever you do, do NOT give JamieBot your address.

I have a Thai restaurant, and a fully stocked kitchen.

JamieBot is a big fat liar. 

I don't see myself being friends with the devil Hm. I need to drink or bake and decorate some shortbread cookies.

Careful JamieBot, the devil is always the person you least expect. Hm. (Oh and spoiler alert: you're going to chose drink.)

I have guns for father's day cookie.

Damn. JamieBot is a better gift giver than me. My dad is super hard to shop for, and that sound pretty much perfect.

So I couldn't think that's easy or not. I can no kids, no nieces/nephews, no way, he's too many fat children.

Unfortunately for my mom, JamieBot is no closer to giving her grand kids than I am.

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